Struggling with Teenagers and Mess: How Can I Get My Kids to Clean Up After Themselves?

[manonfire6640]

@fedejownkew using food as a punishment can give kids a negative relationship with food x

 

[fedejownkew]

@manonfire6640 it's not a punishment. We just choose not to buy this type of food. But I understand your point.

 

[flame110]

Is your bf father to any of them? Can he not offer support? If he's not father to them then he could still say as an adult living there, that there's rules and boundaries. Maybe let them deal with their own rooms and as long as everywhere else is kept tidy then call it a compromise. You could start giving them pocket money for chores and change the WiFi password! Good luck.

 

[weezerjen985]

the only advice i can give it deep breath sit them all down together explain how you feel set boundaries and consequences that will affect them … get rid of the internet let them use their data and save a bill … however be prepared to stick with the consequences and follow it through things won’t change overnight but will slowly improve

 

[greenpillow123]

Could have written this myself @mel8899

 

[calebbenedict]

@greenpillow123 the same here

 

[justanobserver26]

I think its all down to modern days, I know when I was young I was taught to respect your elders,now a days most kids don't respect their elders ,some do ,but not many it's a sad world.
When I told my grandaughter she should respect her elders, her answer was, why should I.i would never have dreamt of saying that to anyone older than me when I was young.Its called respect.

 

[tsjon410]

@justanobserver26 teenagers in every generation have always had their own rebellions. Now we don't b*at the kids, there's the Internet feeding ideas into younger minds.
Back in the 50's TV and rock and roll was blamed. In the 90s it was cartoons and e numbers.
When actually, empathy isn't formed until after teenage years. They have their childhood rose tinted glasses removed. Parents are no longer amazing hero's, were just people with flaws....
But teenage rebellion has always been there!

 

[justanobserver26]

@tsjon410 yes that is very true.

 

[jelly8802]

We have Google family link on our phones - allows me to set limits on apps, specified downtime etc. I can switch their phones off when I want from the comfort of my chair. May help someone struggling to take phones away or using data etc

 

[unsophisticated]

If the phones are on contract the you should beable to access them via your account. You can gift data. Maybe might be a lovely idea to gift yourself all their data and the turn your WiFi off.

 

[princeadedeji]

can you not block their phones, it takes a couple of days to go back on so they will hate that!! worked for me!

 

[inlovewithmybestfriend]

My children only have 2gigs of data on their plan so when the wifi gets turned off even if they use their data all there data is gone exceptionally fast (like a couple of youtube/tiktok videos and its gone) and then they are left with no data for the rest of the month and only have the wifi. I also had enough of my children not washing up what they use so i got rid of all cutlery plates bowels glasses etc and bought new. One set for Each person that lives in the house and they are colour coded eg child 1 has blue plate bowl cutlery cup glass, child 2 has green, child 3 has pink, child 4 has beige and my partner and i white. That way everyone instantly knows whos it belongs to. (I have 2 spare sets for company that are put away from the family’s) it took a while of me having to chase them to pick up and clean up behind them but because i knew who it was I didn’t have the arguments of its not mine etc and it got so much better then after a few months when it was just occasionally they would leave stuff i said I wasn’t going to check and chase them i was going to turn their wifi off with out warning and they will have to figure out why. I honestly didn’t have to turn their wifi off more than a couple of times without warning for them to now 99.9 percent of the time to do it off their own accord. This may seem like an extreme measure to some but it worked so well for our family and the children do not hate us so it cant of been that bad for them lol. However they do all comment that the house is so much more organised and tidy now and that they like it the house this way.

 

[naomijshaw]

Literally could of written this myself x

 

[canyoneer]

Hide the chargers!

 

[canyoneer]

They can get them back once they do their list of chores

 

[a17]

@canyoneer I’m doing this!

 

[peterngo]

Turn the Internet off, take the devices away, cook a really crap, boring dinner! Do the bare minimum for them until they listen. Write a list of stuff that you expect them to help with! I know how you feel, it took tears for my 11 and 8 year old to start actually pulling their weight and helping out around the house, we all live here.. we all help!

 

[conanbarbarian]

I have one of theese to she’s 16 to n I put a block on her phone so she carnt use it but she goes on chat and unblocks it.she thinks she’s an adult and can do as she pleases x

 

[buddy4now]

Forget about the 16 & 15 year old give the the 13 & 9 year old a reward for helping you.
As soon as the older ones see rewards for doing stuff they'll definitely want some of that action.
Don't turn off the WiFi just change the password then call the phone companies and say I want to cap data usage.
Once all data is gone oh well no Internet.