Had a Blast with a Scammer Today – Share Your Own Stories of Turning the Tables!

[toshimonkey]

Scammer- I'm running about your accident
Me- is that the one where the can of beer jammed under the break pedal when I was smoking my drugs and the dealer was arguing with me on my mobile? I didn't spill any wine though so that's ok
Scammer- click

 

[wpa997]

I usually answer spam calls by saying "have you hidden the body yet"

 

[spikespie]

My mate got sick of the same gardening people calling them, and not taking no for an answer. So they made an appointment for a rep to visit.....not mentioning that they lived in a forth floor flat.....the rep wasn't very happy, but they didn't call again

 

[james343]

6_-+5((±+(

 

[sicleeffect]

“ that was quick I’ve only just walked in from hospital. I’m impressed . Will you help me sue them?”

 

[methodized]

How To Handle A Scammer ~
I had a call from a scammer the other day.
Me: “Hello.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Hello. This is Bob Bobson from Microsoft Support. We are seeing a lot of virus activity from your device.”
Me: “Oh no. My device? Are you sure?”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Oh yes, we have many reports.”
Me: “Oh jeez. How can I fix it?”
NOT-Microsoft support: “It’s okay Sir. We can help you right now. Are you in front of your device Sir?”
Me: “Yes. I was just about to use it. I’m glad you called.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Yes Sir, we are going to help you. Can you please push the Start button?”
Me: “I think it’s already on.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Okay, Sir. Now you want to click on Control Panel.”
Me: “I don’t see that.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Do you see a bunch of information above the Start button?”
Me: “Yes.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “That is your Control Panel.”
Me: “Wow, I didn’t realise it had a name.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Yes Sir, now press on Internet Options.”
Me: “Yeah, I definitely don’t see any Internet options. I don’t think I purchased that feature. This is just a cheap one.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “They all have the Internet, Sir. Press the Start button again.”
Me: “Okay, it’s the same as before.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “That’s okay Sir. We are going to restart your device. Can you please turn it off?”
Me: “Um … I don’t know how. I’ve never turned it off. Since I bought it, it just kind of stays on all the time.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “There must be an off button on your device. How do you stop it when it’s running?”
Me: “In those cases, I usually press the big button.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Okay sir. Please press that button.”
Me: “Okay.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Is your device off?”
Me: “No. The door popped open.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Door? Is there a disc inside the door?”
Me: “No, there’s a burrito.”
NOT-Microsoft support: “Why is there a burrito in your computer?”
Me: “Computer? I thought you said this was microwave support.”

 

[steven92]

@methodized i laughed to hard,

 

[blacksheepkate]

@methodized I'm dead you've killed me off I hope this is a true event bet the scammer was howling

 

[andytrichards]

@methodized I can't stop laughing...

 

[faithlife]

I had brilliant fun stringing a scammer along for a day

https://www.facebook.com/223707043/posts/10102768653669888

 

[damageddolly]

I managed to string along one of those "accident you had recently" - pretended had had lots of accidents and asked which one they were referring to - they said the most recent...
Me - "oh wow that was quick, it only happened last week!"
Them - mentally rubbing their hands then asking for details
Me - well this Anvil appeared in the road
Them - confused
Me- yes! That damn coyote dropped it in front of me
Them - hung up
Managed to waste about 7 minutes of their time

 

[app_state_em]

@gregster8403

 

[quando62]

Years ago I went on a dating site this chap seemed OK. He then asked me to send him a saucey picture of me so I sent him a picture of a bottle of tomato sauce.

 

[loveyhwh]

Whenever the scam calls come in about being in accidents I either say “I wish I had of been” they hang up immediately or I tell them yes I’ve been in an accident recently, I broke blah blah blah bones and then give them very boring facts about those specific bones, it wastes so much of their time and I don’t let them get a word in edgeways which results in them getting frustrated and hanging up anyway

 

[bieker329]

I had a scammer call me once, it came up as a local number so I answered it.
They told me they were calling regarding my request for loft insulation, so I told them I'm not sure why I requested that as I live in a ground floor flat of a high rise block of flats.
The line went dead

 

[abrahamscaria]

I’ve had that call loads of times. I’m going to have to think of done good answers now

 

[jolugibe]

This is one I had a few years ago
Me, Hello?
Them, hi we have reason to believe that you were in a car accident recently.
Me, yes I was. I am quite surprised to be alive to be honest as I went over a cliff.
SILENCE, CLICK.

 

[search4him]

I get alot of scammers on Instagram, I let them think I dont know what they are doing, then I tell them they have a text book scammer account, I have been blocked by scammers before on Instagram...I gave them a shout out on my stories they didn't like it

 

[username434]

We kept having nuisance calls for my mom, one day my dad answered answered one and when they asked for her he told them she was dead and put the phone down mom was just sat there with her dinner, fork paused halfway to her mouth in shock

 

[cyoung35]

@virtuous77 some of these are Great