Finding Time for Self-Care Amidst Perimenopause and Single Parenting: A Journey to Prioritize Myself

[muffinsofchaos]

I came off my patches as I was raging! Much better without them - although those that caused the rage gave me genuine reason anyway!
I’m a working mum of four with lots of different s.e contracts and it’s a juggle but I do find popping my headphones on with a podcast or music whilst I clean or go for a walk helps! I also have to have stuff in my diary to look forward to or train towards (climbing or running etc) that helps focus! Xx
I should add I’ve stopped inviting people round and pleasing the masses as it wasn’t returned so I’m no longer breaking my neck for others x

 

[robh]

I find the whole concept of "self care" to be a bit abelist, privileged and gaslighty.
I absolutely agree that it's vital but the people who most need it are ysually the ones who are least likely to actually be able to do it.
Both of my kids are autistic and life can be challenging but the things that are most challenging are not my kids but the society that they are expected to fit into. The fact that a schools are unable or unwilling to acknowledge need and meet it.
The thing I find angers me tge most is when I'm talking in a meeting about the meltdowns my kids have at home because school has been so stressful for them and school turns tound and says i need to find time for me. I wouldn't need to do that if school actually did what they are legally meant to do.

 

[apricotpie]

I love that you've posted this in a way that is about finding what works for you, in your situation, and with your needs / preferences in mind. I think we can conjure up images of pampering bubble baths for hours when we hear the term 'self-care' (and there's nothing wrong with that if that's your thing!), but it might not be for all of us, for many different reasons. In my humble opinion, it's not even about putting yourself first, it's just about you being in the mix, and definitely not always last! I really hope you enjoy your 30-mins a day, and if sometimes you get a little more that's great, if it's a little less sometimes then don't beat yourself up over it

 

[gcooldude]

I find that when I take 30 minutes I want more so I don’t take the 30 minutes.

 

[pokemont17]

Do what is best for you, i sometimes take 30 mins, sometimes i rant, lol. Whatever helps you feel like you again. I think it's great that your son was able to go after guests had left and unwind. Take care of yourself.

 

[lash94]

I don't self care either. The uni course I am doing is always encouraging us to self care. I feel so guilty if I do being a mum of 4. But guess that's just my choice really x

 

[footballmommy]

You definitely need self care!! If you don't look after you, who else will do it? Grabbing 30mins here and there when you can. YOU DESERVE IT xxx

 

[phemsammy]

I've got a 2year old and a 4year old. The little one doesn't get it but at 4 my daughter is amazing at self regulating, she'll take herself off and sit quietly for 5/10mins saying she needs a break. Even at birthday parties or soft play! I really need to take a leaf out of her book and step back every now and then. My friend always says "u can't pour from an empty jug" x

 

[skala]

Do you ladies mind me asking....what age did you're pre menopause kick In?

 

[betty401]

@skala I think around 42 I'm now 47

 

[skala]

@betty401 thanks x

 

[allykat79]

@skala 35 x

 

[skala]

@allykat79 thanks SJ xx

 

[mabelight]

About 45, difficult to say, I started having breathing problems 2 years before they diagnosed hormonal asthma, about the same time as the gluten intolerance and chronic fatigue! I'm loving this stage of my life

 

[skala]

@mabelight, oh lord!!!

 

[harmur]

A little creativity a day keeps the grumpies away!